Q.6: Has it all been rosy for you in life, or did you also have your share of challenges? Please share some challenges you have faced in life.
I had to laugh out loud with this. my life has had its challenges, but I do not dwell on what did go wrong. I was a woeful student, and I would skip out of classes. I really feel for my parents as I was a rebellious child. The school did not interest me at all. Like I have mentioned before. It’s not education to make a kid do something they are not remotely interested in. This is cruelty.
My biggest challenge is being a Mother. Dear lord, I would have to say I came with no Maternal instincts. Then you get this child with no instruction manual, and they send you home to care for it for the remainder of your time. This was totally a life-changing experience. I think they were both case studies on how I felt Children should be raised. I had my daughter at 30 and my son at 36 years old.
My daughter felt she was institutionalised in a Private girl’s school for 13 years and hated it. I have to laugh as I thought that enrolling her in one of the better private schools, I was doing a wonderful job as a mother. She also told me at the age of 20 that she discovered she was quite smart in Math. Another failed parent moment, as I thought I had told her that for years. Her perception was that she did extra tuition as she was bad at Math. She has now graduated with a Degree in Actuarial Science and is doing her master’s in Data analytics.
My son is more like me; he is figuring out what his interests are. So, I see a lot of myself in him, and I know that he will turn out alright. As he needs to find his niche, his interests. These things are important because I have to fight hard to “seek not to make him like my husband or me”.
I used to have this Poem “stuck on my family fridge for my parents to read” this was my parenting advice for them, and now this is has been a lesson for me in raising my two children.
“Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you yet, they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
Which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them,
But seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.” Kahlil Gibran